How do you send your kids off to college? Ten Tips for Preparing Your Freshmen for The World Ahead

Just like Robert McCloskey’s “Make Way for Ducklings” children’s book, parents “make way” for their children.

But the day comes when our children will have to finish high school and go to college or leave home on their own. As parents we are left to wonder: Are we doing enough? Are we teaching them the things they should know?

Kids might not know everything, but 10 will be able to help your ducklings navigate adulthood.

Understand Social Niceties
We make room for them until they are a certain age. They order them food at restaurants and make introductions to new people. We then nudge our children on the shoulder by saying “Apologize for your brother.”

Introducing children to different social settings–formal and informal, business-like, or casual–is an excellent way to expose them to adult life. Are they able to properly apologize for making a mistake? Are they able to look at someone and introduce themselves? Can they place an order in a restaurant where there is seated service? These basic skills will be more beneficial if they are taught early.

Know How To Make Food
Baby birds quickly discover that they are not provided with any kind of worms or bugs when they leave their nest. The same applies to children who move away from home.

As a young person, you need to be able to cook. Not just take out or make dinner. Children learn how to cook together by shopping for food and cooking with their families. Every child needs at least one week of easy, cheap meals that they can prepare from scratch. You can kick it up and make your child a better cook.

Know How To Clean Up
Homes and clothes can’t be washed by themselves. Knowing how to do your laundry and clean the living spaces is an important skill. Children who can’t load dishwashers or make dishes by themselves are terrible roommates. The same goes for kids who’ve never used a vacuum or toilet brush.

Learning how to properly sort laundry helps white clothes stay white. Also, knowing when you should use bleach that is safe for color can prevent clothes from getting stained. For professional looking clothes, simple repairs such as sewing buttons or repairing a seam are important.

Be Able To Ask Questions
Children learn to manage routine house chores like cleaning and cooking. They also acquire an important adult skill, asking questions.

Parents of teens know it can be difficult to get their children to confess that they don’t understand something. Unafraid of asking questions helps children learn the bigger lesson in life, that is they don’t really know everything. We don’t know everything.

Manage Time
It can be stressful to move out of your home and into a apartment or residence hall. This is especially true if you were a high school student and mom/dad took care of breakfast preparation, wake up calls and ensuring that all assignments and projects were done on time.

To succeed in college and at work, children need to learn how to cut out time-wasters (TikTok videos anyone?). You can organize your calendar and set goals. Create to-do lists. Prioritize what’s most important. And create daily routines to allow you to accomplish all tasks while still maintaining a balance between work and life.

Manage Money
Although it can be difficult to teach money management skills to children, inflation is on the rise. It’s even more crucial than ever that they understand and manage money before they go out on their own.

Help them to save their money and start when they are young. Pro tip: Keep loose change and money in a clear container so that they have money to grow. Help middle schoolers prioritize their purchases. This will teach them how money can be earned and not handed. High school students should be encouraged to take part-time work. Then, help them set up bank accounts and create budgets. Finally, assume responsibility for all their expenses.

Assess Someone’s Character
It can be thrilling to form new friendships and romantic relationships without the supervision of your parents. However, bad character judgements could lead to serious consequences. It’s important that you use high school years to teach your adult to judge a person’s character.

Before a romance or friendship goes too far consider the following character-revealing situations.
What is the attitude of potential romantic partners or new friends when they treat waitstaff at restaurants and custodial personnel in residence halls? Are they easily angry or do they often get mad? Are they proud of their accomplishments or do they need to be the best? Do they show empathy? Are they empathetic? Do you see signs of perseverance in them? Do you feel confident in this individual holding $50 to your account for a weekend?

Handle Getting Sick
Children often have to learn how to deal with illness when moving away from their parents or to college. It is important for children to be able to read and understand how to check their body temperature. They need to also know when low-grade fevers are considered “you should see a doctor”, when it becomes a “you must go to the doctor” fever and when they need to return to school.

Remind them that they should always have a bag of saltine crackers and some chicken soup on hand. Also, keep several bottles of lemon/lime soda or ginger ale handy. In times of injury or sickness, it is always a good idea to have a kit and education on first aid.

Personal Safety
Being an adult is not complete without personal safety. A self-defense course suddenly becomes as essential as algebra late at night on a dark street. Basic self-defense classes can help improve your situational awareness, street smarts and teach basic skills that will keep you safe in the face of bad situations.

Explore your local area for classes, or if you don’t find one, consider taking a virtual class like Understanding and Applying Self Defense Strategies by Tammy Yard McCracken from The Great Courses.

Show Up
Woody Allen once said “80% of success in your life was showing up.” While the numbers may vary depending on the person speaking, it is clear that showing up is half the battle.

Find out how to show up by joining an orchestra or band, performing in theatre, or participating on a team. Next, you can move on to part-time work during weekends and summers. When it is time for a permanent job, being there to work becomes a natural response.

When it comes to teaching adult skills, the “start early, avoid the rush” approach is the best. This allows for time to deal with problems as they occur. However, young adults who are about to enter the adult world can benefit from a brief crash course on adulthood.

And as they go off to find their way around the world, let them know you are there to support and cheer them on.